Being a parent is perhaps the most rewarding role one can have. It makes you feel complete, adds to your purpose in life and its just such a wonderful feeling to have your own lil children around, running , jumping and laughing. Such Bliss!
Then comes the part where you forget the bliss, and just want to pull out your hair! The fun and laughter, turns in to exasperated pleas to “eat your cereal, do your homework or be careful, you’ll fall”. And if you’ve got teenagers, it’s a different ball game all together. Here you are trying to be their friend, do all that the self help books on teens tell you, and all it needs is a “ get off my back mom!” or “ I hate you, you don’t even care” from your kid, to make your emotions go flying off the handle and you too, like your teen, are venting, yelling, justifying about how much you are trying and they cant see that, and that its for “your own good”.
It is natural to lose control occasionally, but slowly, along with your job stress, daily house chores, social obligations, avoiding the extra calories, trying to find time for your spouse and failing to find any time for yourself, you start getting irritable with your child’s tantrum more and more and more!
Here! exactly here, is the time, you need to stop, take a step back, and remember how you never wanted to be at this stage. Exhausted, frustrated and feeling guilty.
We believe that we will be able to manage all aspects of our lives, perfectly. Infact, we believe we “should” be able to manage all aspects of our lives perfectly. Hence, we do not seek guidance till things go completely over our heads.
The longer we wait to get help, the more the damage is already done.
So instead of going through this chaos, do the best thing you can do for yourself: ie: to get guidance from a therapist.
- Am I unable to focus on my studies/work because I keep thinking about gaming or social media?
- Is it keeping me from going out with family or friends?
- Do I lose sleep and appetite over it?
If your answer to any of these is “yes”, maybe it’s time you acted on the information. Here are some tips:
- Allow yourself to be guided in ways that will work the best for you and your family.
- Allow yourself to de-stress, by venting out in a safe space.
- Allow yourself to see your children with new perspective.
- Allow yourself to become easier on yourself.
- Allow yourself to be open to new parenting styles.
- Allow yourself to seek a therapist.